Under siege in my own house

Dear Pastor,

I am 30 years old and have three teenagers living with me. Their mother passed away a few years ago, and I took them in and sent them to school because no one else was able to do so. The two girls have never caused any trouble, but the boy has always been a troublemaker.

I have tried to guide him, and the teachers at his school were very supportive, but now he has completely gotten out of hand.

He has a girlfriend and he wants to come in and out of my house, and he brings the girl and has sex with her right in my house. I told him that I cannot allow him to do so, but he has been quite rude to me. He said that it seems to him that I want him to turn a homosexual.

He said that if I can bring my man in the house and sleep with him, why can't his girlfriend come to the house.

His sisters will tell you that they have never seen a man sleeping over at my house.

I told him this young man that even if I were taking someone to my place, I am an adult. I have asked him to leave, but he refuses to go.

I struggled to buy this house--no one helped me; I did it entirely on my own.

His sisters have always been very respectful and attend church with me, but he has stopped going and is now smoking weed. I fear that one day he may be arrested because he is completely out of order. Some of the things he has, I know he did not work to earn. I do not know where he got them from, which makes me even more concerned that he may be stealing.

I am asking for your advice. I cannot allow him to remain in my house and bully me. I used to pay a day worker to wash clothes for everyone, but I have stopped her from washing his because he would not even give me a dollar toward the cost. She also complained that one day, when she did not do something to his liking, he cursed her with expletives.

What do you suggest I do?

D.

Dear D.,

You have asked him to leave your house. I suspect that you have done so verbally. You should now put that in writing. I am not a lawyer, but that is what has come to my mind.

You may get advice from a lawyer, but I know for sure that you should not allow him to remain in your house, so get some advice as soon as possible.

He is very out of order. So right now, that is how I see it.

This young man may want to beat you in your own house. He needs to find his own place and he needs to do so now.

Pastor